Thursday, 21 June 2007

I ez back men!!azzz innnn!!!!

Yello???ow ah you??gosh being broke is not cool man!!kai- see me counting my brown coins!!lol!!so recent development!!
I text him one text like this that basically said what i shouda said like a million and one years ago but you know my luck aint that bounz so he only got half the message-had one of those *some text missing* thing at the end cos the message report said it didnt send fully!! anyho, the msg went something along the lines of:

'Hey x, i really dont know what posessed me to restart(i know shelling. i was damn ouddie) talking to you, but i suppose curiousity got the better of me. Anyho, i think its best i stop callin(well, he didnt object cos he didnt text back and its not anything he can control) and to be honest, you still have a babe and regardless of that, you have less to offer than i want. well all the best in your professional development im sure you'll excel beyond even your own expectations(cos this guy is arrogant so this is some serious big ups). Drunken text messages are not the best way to emotionally articulate ones self but thats all i can offer you. bye.'

i actually dont know what to say about it really- it was a drunken mess- allow chicks!!slarra- im sure you know we are dealing with a mad woman!!anyho, on to better news- i found me a new target!!-oh yes- Mr Arinze!!-yes i know, hes Ibo and i dont really go for em but anyho, we shall see innit- summer has only just begun!!- there is one parry that i know hell be at and all i can say is God help him!!-main!!the outfit is tooooooooo mad!!im talkin sexy and classy with a bit of retro chucked in!!- gwen stefani and got shit on me!!!- this geezer is kinda sharp- goes to a good uni(none of that Thames Valley nonsense-no offence but thames valley= sweet valley= a complete joke mate)!!!- but anyho, its fair to say i will not be going there again- k i said that b4 but this time its different!!-i hope- was gonna call tom tho!!lol!!pretend i didnt send it but then i told myself 'who am i kidding??-i can do better than that!!'!!

anyho, went across london today, in search of shares- all i wanted was to purchase first bank shares!!-but what happened- flipin 9ja bank went to take this berreful babe to LEWISHAM!!!!YES I KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!i was ill!!!k, i didnt actually get to LEWISHAM-ended up at canary wharf and waited for popsi to go there only to find out that the address that First bank gave for international stock purchases was somewhere else, and tehn pops was given a number of some citibank branch- he now called and they were now like 'sorry but we cannot actually deal with this stock purchase' and they gave him one number in LAGOS!!!!-AAARRRGGHH!!!-well chicks were scoping goiz in canary wharf who were on their lunch break- too mad!!-

oh my days, i didnt even tell you what i saw, this asian couple(no onler than 21) came out from the hood bit of canary wharf station all adjusting their clothes!!yes o!these people were doing the main steez!!!i was like huh!!!???what is this???oh my days!!these young people of they got balls!!i just looked at them in disgustt and then burst out laughin!!!- so back to the first bank shares malarkie!!so cos we couldnt actually purchase them here, we had to call some stock brokers we(k, my popsie) knew- but for some unknown reason, peeps were not pickin up!!there was this one guy that we really needed to contact cos the deadline was today and so we HAD to sort it out today- this was 4 o clock now and banks close at 5!!!so we were really rushing- 5 o clock came and went and still no word- i was gutted cos i just managed to land a healtthy number of shares after some negotiation with ma pops and sis for me galavanting across to saaf side to go and buy shares!!- so now at 6 o clock, one of my many business peeps in nige(k, my sisters but dont watch that) called to say that the deadline had been extended to july!!lol!!what a waste!!!its all good sha!cos i was soooo tired as well- woke me up from sleep at 11am in the morning!!i need a job!!

so ive got this arinze guy that im about to kill and some other moves here and there but we wont disclose yet cos thats work in progress!

oh my days- today i cricklewood!!!!i saw the scariest weave ever!!!see peroxide blond, see white, see burgrundy see purple( im soooo sure there was green but i dont wanna go ott)the weave was mad!!!i wanted to die!!!

anyho, paries gallore this hols, is it anonymous??is it fetish??sweet escape??rouge, belle de jour??ann ahnnn!!!too many parties!!but ill be hitting only belle and sweet escape and rouge!!!halla!!- the outfits are gonna be as cam'ron says 'KILLAA!!!!,killa!!!!!!!

well i gotta go now, peeps are shouting at me cos i been ill for 3 days- pray for me!!!as in the other day i got up really ill and i was like daddy, i think im gonna pass out- this was at 4 in the morning!!!this has happened two nights in a row now!!!

so flakey, now im unemployed, start organising Direct debit to my acct o!!!brokeness is not bounz!!!went to buka FAZE 2 today- the gizzard was MADDDDD!!really hot tho- need to excuse myself now- need to go and powder my nose(a.k.a - drop some WMD's- aka throw some D's aka evacuation of dollis hill)!!
sorry for being a tad crude!!!well see yall at belle de jour or rouge!!!

Friday, 8 June 2007

You've started again!!

I forgot to tell you what MR told me when he was askin me to come and talk to him outside(see last post)!!!when i said 'no' he said
'youve started again'!!!6
can you imagine??a whole VTI!!!like im a small child!!thats the thing with silly 9ja boys!!!them and their inferiority complex!!!silly mumu head!!!anyho, i sha told him that i was not his kid for him to be talkin to me like that!!KC boys have really bad communication skills!!lol!!- at least he doesnt sound RAZZ!!!lol!!-thats one thing ill give him credit for-not a razz bone in his body(im sure he has a few- heard him doin one funny funny britico accent to his flat mate- just had to raise my eyebrow over the phone- something like 'wos gowin on maite'-i was dying)

I kinda went to go and call him!!curiousity got the berra of me innit!!now im the mumu head and it really is Mr X-4 VTI-2 cos i boned but.....i didnt do it for long enough to get full points!!!
Ok so he has started his summer runz thanks to me!!!-how daft is that??ive actually let someone and encouraged someone to run game on me!!!lol!!or as that geezer in The Dent said 'LAWL'-hehehe!!!
so i called him so we could talk and he could say what was sooooo important!!- for where!!WHEN I SAY BEAT ABOUT THE BUSH!!!!! i thought i could beat about the bush!!!the guy pass me o!!as in serious cutlass beating around the bush!!i even had to make notes!!

Anyho...i kinda spoke to him for like the best part of an hour-k closer to 2 hrs but dont watch that!!-i dunno if i loike him(i dont wanna write like cos itll make it seem real)
anywhoo, we gisted!!tried to cuss me cos im not nigerian enough!!-errr well umm lets think about this for a quick minute, ive lived here for 16 years!!!!16 years!!!and im not even 25!!he is a mumu head!!he then went on to abuse me that i was 'spoilt'- spoilt ko spoilt ni!!he obviously hasnt seen the housegirl pics on facebook!!lol!!
anyho, i dunno what kind of runz this one is but id rather suss out the game before i get all on his case again-ive already massaged his ego so ive lost very crucial bonus points!!!never mind eh!!??

so what do i do now???yes im askin you!!cos i really dunno what to do!!I specifically tol dhim that i was not ready emotionally to deal with anything he had to say for himself and its true!!!-see me crying while watchin 'in her shoes'- yes i hear echoes of 'ode ni e' from blog world!!i know!!dont tell me!!! i was just sad cos the Camron diaz went to go and nyash her sisters man!!-deep move and then the sister found happiness!!im weird- sharrap i know!!
So VTI is cryin for no freakin reason- k i was crying cos i was upset cos i actually still like him!!-WTF??i know- im special!!-this is like the worst thing that can happen to someone like me!!i mean im a flippin hard babe!!!who the heck is he!!!-my mu squared friend went to go and give me the l word-no, not lesbian and not like...its the other other other word that i dread soooooooooooooo much!!as in, its one thing thatll make me avoid someone forever!!
I cant even bare the thought of me liking him to the 'L' extent!!AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!somebarry save me!!!

k. ok!!he wont find out but why the heck do i feel like this!!-flippin miserable cos i aint spokent to him!!-i feel a blogger slap from flakey trying to shake me up!!am i drunk or something??have a unknowingly started smoking beans again and gari??is it too much village palm wine???this one is mad!!

i still cant get over the fact that i cried!!-and i have deleted all the gay songs i havbe on my i pod so i dont accidently shuffle to that song!!-iuts funny how before the songs had no meaning but now its like the songs were written for me!!!-lol!!for example the old school song 'somebody elses guy' and pinks 'stupid girl'!! teedra moses 'be your girl'!!AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!!!all these songs- i still have kelis's 'i hate you so much right now' and the usual wu tang stuvvs!!

K so we gisted for a while-but why is that makin me shake??as in b4 i called-see chicks hand shakin by the window- i think its cos mentally, i knew i had lost so i was physically trying to hold it together!!never mind!!

so my plan of action is this, on tuesday(if i can actually hold out until then), i will text him and say

'hey X, tis i.i really am not sure if this is some kind of silly game but i tend to lose games. and if this is part of your summer runz then really and truly, cross moi off the list.I dont need your type of wahala.honestly.I called cos i thought you actually had something to say but as it is, you are unwilling to disclose this so called 'very important' piece of information. If or when we speak again, if you still choose to not tell me, then we'll just end it there cos life is about progression and id rather not regress. Its not an ultimatum but know trhat when i called you the other day, I personally wanted to know what you had to say for yourself, regardless of what my friends had told me, be it excuse or for me to understand but you were not satisfied with my excuse for wanting to know-i suppose your way of dragging things out-typical 9ja guy(i know he'll love this cos u know 9ja guys like to feel different even though they could open a ralph lauren store between them-lol). so if this really is a summer move then pele. im not down for rubbish. I dont mind cutting you off-ive dont it before and i liked you wayyyyyyyy more then so this one is just a small ting!!I dont mind being your friend and in all honesty, thats all someone like me is emotionally capable of so dont worry, its not that deep. all the best mr casanova

think i said all i had to there but how the hecka am i gonna write that in a text- thats like 10 messages!!might as well be writing an essay!!!
do you think im bearing too much seein as we just started yarning again and he still(i think) has a a girlfriend or a main babe!!- I REFUSE TO BE 'THE OTHER GIRL'!!!!God forbid!!

Mr fineguy, you see what i mean with Yourubz goiz??the funny duddy games and strategies!!If he just says, 'VTI lets just be doin things on the side' then i know what to do-FASHI!! and if its some other deep move, (something 'genuine' dare i say) then ill consider it cos i do like him but he does tooo many funny moves!!!ahh ahhhhn!!We shall see innit!!-but there is one thing im stickin to 'no ring, no ting'!!lol!!standard!!-thats one thing that God has helped me with!!i know ppl say its hard in the 21st century but im covered by the blood of Jesus so nadas is gonna happen!!

So he is always laffin!!-im not likin it cos i think hes laughin at me as in LOL 'this babe, ur an ode' kinda laugh and not a 'gosh ur witty' kina thing!! as in... i dont think you understand-he is always laffin like one goat-mu squared!!fewlish gorlla!!I know im not that funny, my dad always tells me!!but then again, i do come up witht he most rediculous things to say!!i dont do it intentionally but i really think my brain is not conditioned for anything that is remotely classes as normal!!

heard he got 69 in his work!!-me and my ears sef!!sharp geezer innit!!-he is yet to shell!!-when he does ill laugh cos in the text i sent him i threw some mad shellz!!im sure he was laughin and tryin to take me seriously when he got that text!!!

Is that message ok to send or is it toooo much pho-neh for a KC guy!!lol!!anyho, lemme know peeps!!my life aint bee n this messed up in a while!!and to top it off, my other mate Mr backup decided to not pick up my call today- is it a conspiracy??

laters peeps

Sunday, 3 June 2007

oh my days!Ive finished

YEs now a graduand!!wooooho!!!bring out the dom perignon homie!!!this is a toast to all the people on blogger that have helped me in perbably the most emotional year of my life!!!golly gosh!!

anyho....see drama this weekend. i didnt want to say anything to jinx it but a while back i said i would start blogging on the 3rd of june for a reason-i was goin got this event on the second and i knew, I KNEW and i re-repeat, i knew that something jweezy (juicy) was gonna happen!!

so here what happened!!
went for an event following the end of my undergraduate life in one zone like this!!flippin hell. thought i was looking a bit mank(ugly) but i sha dressd up with my new hair and my MAD dress!! so i got there and everything....and ohhhh my day!!!i have never seen a nasty lookin bunch of people in my life(apart from my sexy ass friends and i) gowsh we were lookin tooo mad!!!
so i saw one geezer- the one i hate-ok i dont really hate him but i sha dont really care. saw him enuf tims before i even bothered to even ja him face cos the way i see things is that things were on a sour note and he is just an ass(said in a american accent-halla)!! so anyways now- the geezer was there-i just looked him up and down like anything- he gave one of those sheepish boyish looks which usually would make me feel a bit funny and my chest muscles(i dont have a heart you see) would start going 'ti je ti je ti' but this time i was soooo over this one!!-the way i see it is that i tried with him- hes even lucky that i responded to him especially cos hes friends with that dude that kissed and over over over told!! anyho, lemme set the scene....

VTI is sitting in the corner minding her own business-loookin soooo fly and im not even understating nothing!!i was lookin radient,ravishing and blommin regal!!anyho, i had just swapped shoes with my friend cos hers were hurting and everything and so i gave her mine!!anyho...these shoes were like 4 inches and mine were 2.5 so the difference was amazin-as in owwwmazing!!!talk about pain!!-i always wear flats as in always so when i got up and saw him i was like oh dear-lets hope i dont throw my dring at him-but i downed it instead-
anyho now, there was no way of avoidin him so i just did wharevva men!!had to walk through him to go to the bar for another stiff drink so i didnt say to him wat was really on my mind!!so as i got up my feet nearly gave way as in i wanted to die!!-so i managed to compose- so now our eyes met-he was smiling and i was not Catherine Tate bovvered i just gave one of my random fake smiles cos i really was not pleased to see him!!

so heres the conversation:
*he smiles-she looks through him like 'does this face look bovvered'
it-what are you doin here?(in a polite i think im funny kinda way)
sexy VTI-(also deaf VTI at this point)'huh'
it-what are you doin here?
VTI- im lost
it-when did you come?
VTI- today
it-when ar you leaving?
VTI- ....(ok at this point these questions are just simply silly and im getting beyond tired of these same ol same ol questions-but then again 9ja boys arent one for originality-as in if Jayz or diddy aint worn it, its not cool)-'look, ill speak to you later'
and that was the end of that...until later on!!see me see wahala!!there was an after party-
how many times can you play d banj why me???gosh- for a sec i thought it was for me- lol!!the words 'get paranoid much??' came to mind

so at the after parry, chicks had to change and give them some new baffs Black Jesus says 'its by force by force'!!lol!!
looking again tooo fly!!what can i say...its not reazy!!lol!!

so anyhow, lookin fly so no wonder the goizer started his uselessness again!!
so he now sees me and smiles-like proper grinning-and i am not impressed cos i said i wasnt gonna go to the after parry cos it was at his house with that mutant rat known as his friend!!
anyhow now he smiles and sees me and a give the most confused face. so hes now there lookin for me to respond but i no go gree
it- so should i not be smiling
VTI-*blank face*
it-so how are things?
VTI-(not bovvered at this time cos i thought my chest muscles would tense up and everything but i was just there lookin at him)- i just gave him the chinese ok sign
it-whats with the one word answers
VTI-im fine and you?
it-look can i talk to you outside?
VTI-*by this time awon geezer had already grabbed my hand-i sha moved it cos i was not feelin that move at all!!!''no'
it- why not?i just wanna talk to you for like 2 minutes
it-0dont you think its a bit rude that you dont even want to listen to what i have to say?
VTI-no not really
it-*he repeated the same thing again*
VTI- ok i know its your house and in that respect i think its rude but i dont really think its rude
it-forget about it being my house-irrespective of that- you dont want to hear what i me out-(or something like that)
VTI- err no. I dont
it- so you dont want to know what i have to say
VTI- *slight hesitation cos you know i really wanted to know but i flippin boned man!!!yes-chicks maintained!!i was soooooooo proud of myself cos i coulda easily just sed ok but that owuld have meant that it was Mr X- 4, VTI -1 cos this game was about double points!!

so he now went and said 'ok.fine.and he went off'- im sure it really wasnt that important-so i keep telling myself- well unless he was gonna propose!!-lol!!-im just jokin!!God forbid bad thing for me yo marry some Yourubs geezer!!i rebuke all bad things over my life in the name of Jesus!!
so that was the end of that.
his cousin was like you ok VTI?i was like 'yeah im good' he now went are you sure i was like yeah-even tho i was thinkin 'yeah, your cousn is a twat' but its only cos i was brought up with manners that i allowed it and cos as much as i really dont like him like that-im still human you know so i still have compassion of idiots!!-lol!!
anyho, thought about him today and got that stupid ugly feeling!!AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!its cos my friend said something to me and i was like -oh no!!i really dont wanna like him again!!that was sooo annoying!!!his girlfriend is wayyyyyyyyyyy to nice to have me likin her man!!I dont e